Of Blood Shot Eyes, Much Needed Breathers, and Silent Pillows
I had the chance to see him last night after a week of no communication - not even a single text message, not even a call, nor email on gms.
I had been overly thinking of things alot and I must say that thinking of what will be is such a pain in the ass. So, what we have is an unclear closeness and can be related to mutual understanding. And from what I know, he wants me to be happy. And yes, happiness is what I only feel whenever we are together. but who am I to assume what we have and what we dont have, and ‘just being human at nagkakamali rin’ is not an acceptable reason here in to begin with.
Last night, I had a chance to talk with him while he was just there sitting in the lobby. When I came to approach, I saw someone else with him and I was courteously introduced to the one he was with. I smiled back, waived and said my greetings. It was never an issue for me whether he talked to everyone, or faced someone I dont know. The thing is that, when I reminded him about this coming Saturdays affair, I gained the least expected response one would ever get.
I know that is not the only thing thats on his mind but, it is a planned event and he seemed to care less. I know that its very selfish to think that he must think of it everytime of everyday but what the heck, its an important event.
When I was stepping backwards to leave, i mouthed and asked why was he not replying, and he just smiled and gave an not-so-assuring gesture. So, I turned back and walked away, no questions asked, and waited for no reactions. I was feeling heavy and made buntong hininga just to calm myself. I was not feeling well, and I wanted to go home, but sadly I cant. Of all the feelings to have to start the week, this is what I get. Poocha.
They say, you can only have two among the three things the world has to offer.
And I guess, I dont have the latter.
All I need now is a breather. A time off from the world and a time for myself. A space between the thoughts of making the bad or good choices for myself. If I could seclude myself from the world, I would, but that would be too much.
A little melodramatic act on my own, with bloodshot eyes to end the day, breathers to calm the nerves, and silent pillows to witness the award winning scene, I just might survive the sudden shift of events.
Just kill “him” with kindness.
What’s the difference of try and triumph? A little umph!
Someday, the rain will stop and I’ll cry real tears. Then I’ll find a spot on earth and plant my roots.
Until then, I’ll walk with the rain…
And like the clouds, I’ll drift along.
Been Cooking Lately
So, it has been months since i have blogged something. This time, i have something worth blogging for.
I have enrolled in a short term culinary course and guess what, i already learned much. So, some of the photos of the food/pastry i have cooked and baked are as follows (p.s. sorry for the bad photos. Haha!)
Eclairs with Caramel Glaze
These are the food we cooked/baked. The next posts will be of different categories, so that you’ll salivate for what to come next. Haha!
Till next time. Till i cook and bake other things again. See you.
Yes… She baked the cake but i was the one who decorated it. As usual, we forgot to take a photo before eating this cake so it looked like this. It is a cream cheese covered red velvet cake baked by my classmate. I also took the opportunity to place the flower candies and the leaves as well… too bad the cream cheese was moist enough that the icing on the sides melted before it was refrigerated. Hahaha.
It was still last november when my classmates daughter had her 2nd birthday and i am one of the ninong. She had to bake these cupcakes but hesitated to finish it with icing because i know her hand writting is not good soo maybe the icing will turn out bad, maybe. So to make sure that the cupcakes will look presentable, i took over decorating these cupcakes. hahaha… The cupcakes were already eaten before i could take a photo… i ate the ‘Y’, she ate the ‘R’, her mom ate the other ‘Y’… Oh well…